Remember 2019 at the end of the year – the brand new journal in your hand, bright-eyed and energized about your future – big dreams and EPIC vision… you don’t need me to point out the obvious, but it didn’t turn out the way we thought it would. 

So now what? Is it worth it to look back on a year so heavy and so revolutionary for our individual and collective lives that we are all understandably apprehensive in making “new goals” – the answer, it won’t surprise you, is an undeniable – YES. 

I cannot begin to imagine the pain felt in human hearts, families, and communities, pain caused by recklessness, bias, racism, loss, and the blatancy of our broken human nature. Our world is in a state of uncertainty and agony. 

Many of our friends, brothers, and sisters have been brought to their knees.  And we all, as our hearts are compelled, kneel in solidarity. We are holding the pain of one as it is the pain of us all. 

It is next to impossible in this state, may even feel inappropriate, to dream and vision. 

I am not pretending to have the answer here, but I would like to share a brief personal story with you. 

For many decades now, I have had a friend who – shall remain unnamed for now – is a constant source of safety to me. 

I find safety and permission to stay acceptant of and focused in the direction that my life has taken in their presence. 

My friend brings up evidence of why things are good and how things must stay, pointing to the obvious markers that identify where I have been and what I have made it through—reminding me that I am so lucky to be here and undoubtedly have much to be grateful for. 

At a glance, my life looks safe, achieved, and good. All things that I continue to work hard at. 

What a good friend and how lucky am I to have them. 

You may have a friend like that too, and if you do, you won’t be surprised if I tell you that we share a friend – their name is ….

FEAR. 

Fear collects evidence, facts of your life, like treasures to present before you. 

Fear shows you how lucky you are and scares you to dare to think beyond the horizon of your experience and life. 

Fear presents the evidence of your failures and scares you into thinking that you are a failure. 

Fear presents the evidence of your success and fools you into thinking that you are a self-made success. 

Fear blinds you to your strengths and emotional intelligence, giving you the illusion that you are indebted to your circumstances. 

Fear has you comparing your life to that of others because comparison invites judgment, and that’s the craftiest tool of fear. 

Of all the things that fear wants most, it is your dedication and attention to cultivate your relationship with fear. 

So, for the remainder of this year, in an effort of cultivating possibility, what if we streamlined a bit, got your attention back, and broke up with fear. 

We need a new friend. Let’s have friends who celebrate our efforts to be better this year. Better at seeing others, better at supporting our communities, better at creating opportunities, better at elevating our authentic output, better at making space, better at being kind to ourselves and others, better at forgiving, better at dreaming for a better world, and better at taking action. 

2021 is going to be a better year.